Resisting the Urge to Return the Princess to the Dragon
I prayed that the current silence we enjoyed was something that would last for the rest of the trip. Her Highness and I could manage one short hour riding on a horse in silence, right?
“Are we there yet?” she asked again. I sighed.
“Not yet, Your Highness!” I couldn’t bring myself to face her as I spoke.
“The horse really hurts, though. I hate it. Why didn’t you bring a palanquin?” she begged.
“Well, your Highness, the palanquin requires at least four strong men to carry it, and I am but only a single man.” I sounded patient, but I’m sure my eyes would give away my true emotions.
“Ok, sure, but you fought Bonesmear single-handedly. Shouldn’t that make you able to carry a palanquin?”
I just sighed and rubbed my temples again.
“Well?” she asked sternly. Evidently, it wasn’t a rhetorical question.
“No, you stu — “ I cleared my throat “Your Highness. Not necessarily. You see, it took a lot of cunning to defeat him. I’m sure you noticed that I wasn’t able to kill him, only distract him with the avalanche long enough to escape with you.”
“Ok, sure, but how come you couldn’t use that cunning thing to figure out a better mode of transportation?”
“Princess, can we please just ride in silence — “
“I order you to answer the question!”
“I don’t know!” I snapped, “I thought Apollo was a suitable rider to carry the two of us without any issues! He has proven well thus far!” I said, patting his mane affectionately.
“Yeah, well, he sucks.”
“But he’s half the reason I was able to rescue you!!”
“Rescue? You call that a rescue? I was just moved from one uncomfortable situation to another!” she retorted, folding her arms.
“Uncomfortable situation!?” I enunciated every syllable. “You were held in Bonesmear’s captivity for a month and you refer to it as an ‘uncomfortable situation?’ How could you even associate the two? I freed you from a fire-breathing, human-eating, village-crushing captor! What is wrong with you?”
She didn’t have a response to that. I sighed again, lamenting the fact that I may have hurt her feelings. She may still be in shock of being released from captivity and was trying to vent a month’s worth of suppressed —
“I’m renouncing your knighthood,” she said, a matter-of-factly.
“WHAT!?” I yelled, Apollo’s ears perked a bit in surprise and I pet him a bit to relax him.
“As soon as we return home, I’m renouncing you of your knighthood. I’ll tell my father that you were mean to me.”
“You can’t renounce knighthood because I was mean. Think about Sir Henrick. He’s never been the most affable of men,” I replied.
She took a moment to let that sink in.
“I’ll tell him you touched me,” she stated, plainly.
I pulled Apollo to a halt and wheeled around to face her.
“PRINCESS THAT IS NO JOKING MATTER!” I bellowed, my face burning with rage.
“I’m not joking. I’ll tell him,” she said, looking at me squarely in the eyes.
“Princess, think about what you’re — “
“Tell your stupid horse to keep moving.”
“Not until you — “
“That’s an order!”
My mind raced. I turned back around and wiggled the reins to let Apollo know we were moving again. I could almost feel her smiling behind me. Rage fueled my every move. I slowly, almost imperceptibly, turned Apollo to the right. In about half an hour we would be back at Bonesmear’s castle.
“Don’t think I don’t notice that we turned off the path.”
“I’m heading to Greenvale. I am sure that we can get you a palanquin from there,” I answered quickly.
I felt her shift her position in her seat slightly.
“This pleases me. But it won’t help to undo the damage you’ve done. After all, you can’t untouch me.”
I closed my eyes and buried the first response I had to that.
“I wouldn’t expect it to,” I said.
“Excellent. I look forward to your humiliation. Tell me when we get there.”
Tell her? She leaned on me. She was taking a nap! I smiled, wryly.
“Of course, Your Highness,” I said, petting Apollo affectionately, “I’ll tell you the moment we arrive. I’m sure they’ll be happy to see you.”