The header to my Instagram Profile

I done did it. I played the social media game and have now gained over 25 thousand followers on Instagram. But how did I do it? How much of my psyche was sold to The Instagram Algorithm? And what kind of benefits (and drawbacks) are there to having this many…

Thanks to some fellow indie authors, I was inspired to run a Kickstarter to fund all of the expenses that come with self-publishing a book. It was successful and I was ecstatic! …

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About seven months ago, I began searching for articles indicating to me whether Medium was an appropriate place for me to be publishing my short fiction. …

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I stared at the carton, the unabashed smile mocking my shock. I glanced up at the refrigerator to see the same exact photo with me smiling my big smile at age six. The only difference I could discern was the huge MISSING stamp at the bottom of the carton’s image.

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I coughed up a little bit of blood as the mugger twisted the knife in the victim I was witnessing across the street. They screamed in agony as the mugger ran off with their wallet. I ran across the street, pulling out my phone to dial emergency services. Well, more…

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“You can seriously fix this?” the construction worker asked, scratching the back of his head with wonder.

“Sure, I don’t see why not. So, what are you looking for? A park or something?” I said, pulling back my sleeves and raising my arms at the wall in front of me.

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“I won’t say a thing!” I screamed at the darkness, “Nothing you do will make me talk!”

“Nothing we do?” a man asked, “but we aren’t going to do anything to you.” He kneeled down in front of me and took off my handcuffs. With them, he took off my…

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I blinked a couple of times. I was in the middle of getting up from my couch to get the door when I thought I heard a noise. Another knock at the door snapped me back to the situation.

I got up and took a step.

“Did you not hear…

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“Your corpse?” I asked.

“Yeah, like, my dead body,” he shrugged.

“So, like when you die, you want to be cremated in a volcano?”

“Cremated? What? No, I want you to scoop me up and toss me right into a volcano,” he explained, much like a teacher would a homework…

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Johnny sneered at me. I hated him so much. It seemed his entire existence was just to one-up me. This time it was his stupid universe. It sat floating at the podium in front of the classroom as the best example of what the rest of us should have done.

N. T. Lazer

A microfiction, flash fiction, and general fiction author. With more stories at

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